Every elementary teacher in Japan has had the joy of trying to work with Eigo Note: The frustration that comes with its lesson plans, which hardly incorporate the native speaker at all, the “digital blackboard,” which pretty much makes us obsolete. While I don’t disagree with the English level, it’d be nice if they were a bit more inclusive, after all the ALTs in the elementary schools pretty much run the lessons (or should be anyway).

But they’re the standard text for 5th and 6th grade, so you do what you gotta do.

Well some ALTs took out their frustration on Eigo Note by turning it into something completely twisted in wonderful, in the “How To Use Eigo Note to Pick Up Women.” All of these conversations come from the CDs that accompany our textbook. I’ll never forget the time one of my teachers sprung the “Green Cap” song on me in class, and now I’ll never be able to do it with a straight face.

Let’s enjoying our English teacher humor everyone!

(more…)

New term tomorrow
What will the students do now
That they’re used to me?

I can’t believe it’s been a year already. I start working again tomorrow and have the opening ceremony for 2nd term. It will be so much better this year now that I don’t have those pesky introduction lessons. It’s just been so weird thinking that I actually kind of know what I’m sort of supposed to be doing now (maybe?).

We had Christy’s birthday party today. A group of girls went out to all-you-can-eat pizza and karaoke. I ate so much that I’m still full 8 hours later. At karaoke a partial list of what we all rocked out to included:

• Lady Gaga
• Backstreet Boys
• Bonnie Taylor
• Disney
• Arashi
• Asian Kung Fu Generation
• Olivia Newton-John
• Lily Allen
• Journey
• Queen

If I were a Backstreet Boy, I’d totally be Brian.

I went grape picking today at a vineyard near my house. You pay ¥1000 and you get to go eat all the grapes you can then any grapes you want to take home you pay for. I took the new English teacher in our town for some shaded grape-picking delight.

Once we got inside the vineyard we were told we could cut any grapes we like, except for the very expensive Ruby Romans, which sell for about $1,000-$2,000 a bunch. One Ruby Roman can cost as much as $80 dollars. One grape.

So instead we decided to enjoy the grape picking and eat any of the other varieties out in the field. In the end we went home with a single bunch of grapes. The ladies back at the packing house gave us two bonus bunches to take home for free. Thank you!

They also let us taste the mythical beast that is Ruby Roman. It was very sweet and juicy. It would probably be good after chilling in the refrigerator on a very hot day, but a little out of my price range at the moment.
(more…)

I realized too late
The my new dress was see-through
Please enjoy the view

As a way to stave off boredom throughout the day I’ve decided to make haiku about my day. The one above was about my day yesterday. Here’s today’s:

Chu-hi on the bus
Seemed like such a good idea
My headache dissents

Japanese schoolchildren are adorable. I don’t know if it’s the uniforms or the pigtails or the mullets, but something about everything they do has a twinge of cute overload. At my school, one of the popular games for girls to play at recess is Hana Ichi Monme (花いちもんめ). It’s a little like Japanese Red Rover The girls break off into two teams and walk back and forth at each other while alternating singing a song:

勝ってうれしい花いちもんめ               katte ureshii hana ichi monme
負けてくやしい花いちもんめ               makete kuyashii hana ichi monme
あの子が欲しい                                        ano ko ga hoshii
あの子が分からん                                    ano ko ga wakaran
相談しましょう                                        sodan shimasho
そうしましょ！                                        so shimasho

決まった!　　　　　　　　　　　　 kimatta!
(A Team) Luckyちゃんが欲しい          Lucky-chan ga hoshii
(B Team)Coolちゃんが欲しい　　      Cool-chan ga hoshii

We’re happy we won, hana ichi monme
We’re sad we lost, hana ichi monme
We want that kid
We don’t know “that kid”
Let’s talk about it
Yes, lets!

We’ve decided
We want Lucky!
We want Cool!

It’s not much of a song, but it’s cute to watch. After they sing they huddle in their respective group and pick a member of the opposite team to challenge. The two challengers go out and either play Rock, Paper, Scissors or a game of chicken. The loser is then made to join the winning team.

In case you don’t believe me, here’s a video of the game in action: (more…)

Yes it’s controversial. Yes it’s against everything I’ve ever been taught, but when it’s there in the supermarket staring me in the face, I can’t resist the call. I wanted to try whale meat. I’ve wanted to try it ever since 1999 when the Makah were granted permission to hunt a single gray whale and eat it. And boy did I get flak for it. From my friends to my boyfriend I got loads of “I can’t believe you’re going to eat that.” Well what do you want me to do? Return the hunk of whale meat to the wild? No, it went into my belly (and my boyfriend’s too even though he claimed he’d never want to try it.)

The first problem I had with the whale meat was “how do you cook it?” Luckily, the World Council of Whalers has a Web site complete with recipes. And while Japan by no means relies on whaling  for “cultural, nutritional and economic sustenance” it has been  a part of Japanese culture for hundreds of years. Though, I found it interesting that although whale is no longer hunted “commercially” I was still able to purchase it at my local grocer. Someone’s making a profit on this meat and I don’t think it’s a scientist.

Long story short I cooked the meat and ate it. It was OK. It tasted kind of like steak, but was a lot more tender. I would prefer beef to this any day because beef comes with a lot less stigma and ire.

Pictures inside

(more…)

A compilation of some of the random quips from my kids. (Conversations in italics were in Japanese.)

Male Student: Which boy is your type?
(One of the first questions I was asked when I started @ the junior high.)

4th Grade Girl: Her arms are soft! Like a bunny! (The children learn about arm hair. And I don’t think my arms are AS soft as a bunny’s.)

Me: I’m from America.
1st grader: You’re wrong! You’re from Germany!
(I’m getting schooled on my mother country by a first grader.

Me: Why is Santa green?
6th grader: Because he’s a frog.
(Ahhh, such sound logic)

3rd grader: Melanie-sensei! Melanie-sensei! Today we learned that “sensei” means “teacher,” so do we call you “Teacher Melanie” or “Melanie-teacher”?
(I don’t want to correct him because he’s so enthusiastic about it)

I’m finally done with my move, my cat appears to have adjusted to the dogs and now all that’s left is for me to prepare for my upcoming trip. For the next few weeks I’m going to be documenting what kind of things I’ve been doing and what others should strongly consider before going abroad to Japan. This will mainly be aimed at women since I’m a woman and  don’t have experience in shopping for clothes in Japan for men.

Stock up on essentials before you go

If you’re 5’4″ and no bigger than a size 8, congratulations –you will have no problems shopping in Japan. If you’re 5’7″ and have a curvy figure, finding clothes will be more of a problem than it is in the states. Even when I was at my thinnest in Japan (which was the smallest I’ve ever been) I still had a hard time finding clothes that fit me properly.

The biggest problem I had was finding new pants. In Japan, the pants are cut to be shorter than what you would find on the racks in the states. Almost everything is pre-cut to fit the petite frames of Japanese women. If you’re not a petite size or bigger than a size 10 in jeans or larger than a 34C for bra sizes, I recommend stocking up on pants and bras BEFORE you go to Japan. I also recommend bring one or two tight-fitting pairs and a slightly smaller bra in case you lose weight while you are over there.

Buying tops for Japan

By far the biggest problem I’ve noticed in my wardrobe is the number of low-cut, cleavage enhancing tops. These types of shirts are OK to wear in America, especially in the summer. In Japan it’s considered immodest to bear your cleavage as freely as we do here. Women’s shirts in Japan are cut a lot higher because of Japanese culture and customs. Bowing is very common in Japan, and while Japanese bows are quick and to the point, you still don’t want someone looking down your shirt while you’re doing it.

If you have a number of low-cut tops, either don’t bring them or experiment with layering. Get some solid color tanks to wear under your skimpier shirts so you don’t have to go out and buy a whole new wardrobe.

Listen to what people are(n’t) saying about your clothes

In Japan, saying what you really mean isn’t exactly chic, so listen for any veiled criticism about your outfit. Comments along the lines of “Oh, you are showing off so much skin” should not be taken as a compliment. Remember, Japanese people sometimes have a hidden context, so please keep an open eye and ear to how people are reacting to you.

In an effort to make myself feel better about essentially abandoning my boyfriend for a year, I decided to start getting a preliminary price idea for how much James’ flight would cost when he comes to Japan in December after he graduates. Well a roundtrip flight to my prefecture is nearly $2,000 (YIKES!). So I started pricing how much four one-way tickets would cost (Seattle to Tokyo, Tokyo to Ishikawa, Ishikawa to Tokyo, Tokyo to Seattle). Things were looking up. The flight over would cost about $850 for both flights, but the last flight to get James back to the states would cost $2,000 on its own.

The first flight to Tokyo only cost $550. What’s up with that? I’m going to keep pricing flights by using the airline Web sites and maybe I’ll find better results. In the mean time James and I will will be asking our families that our collective birthday/graduation/Christmas gifts be money to pay for his flight and fund some adventure for us around Japan.

So I noticed that whenever I tell anyone where I’ll be living I seem to get a lot of blank stares and “so are you near Tokyo or Osaka?” I’m near neither. Rather than try and explain it I’ll just point it out. I am living here:I’ve pointed out about where Kahoku is on the map. It’s right on the coast. I can’t wait to go swimming and cause a minor disturbance by wearing a bikini.